Alright, so I'm watching Lost, and I admit, I'm a cynic. SOMEHOW, Richard agreed to take Daniel to the hydrogen bomb because he proclaims his love to the redhead. Really? Richard is an other? Who knew this show was so sappy. -_-'

Finally, a new year (according to the lunar calendar) and am I glad to be done of it. The Year of the Rat (2008) was horrible for me. Within that year, I've had 5 mishaps with a car, 3 within the past 3 months (2 of which could've been fatal). I suppose I was LUCKY to survive the ordeal, but then again, to go through it couldn't have been very lucky. I should mention that the last few hours of what was left of the year of the rat resulted in me tripping on the sidewalk, temporarily spraining my ankle, and falling down a very short flight of stairs, hurting my hand. *sighs* Supposedly though, this year is not very good for dragons so I'm a little wary of the upcoming year. How much worse can it get? .... Actually forget that I asked the question, but still, =/ I don't want anymore bad luck!!!!

Anyway, hope everyone has a good new year. :) Chuc Mung Nam Moi!

BTW, I met Wang Lee Hom. The hottest singer over in Taiwan. Got his autograph and I shook his hand. :D *Swoons* one of the best moments of my life. I'm just sad I didn't get to take his picture... like REAL up close :(

I have a new layout. I succumbed to Livejournal's new layout format style, which I gotta admit, is a lot more appealing than my old layout. I got the purple oddity one, which I found amusing. Abandoned my Karma headline, and adopted Anything I'm Not by Lenka, who is one of my new favorite artists. I've had that Karma headline for years.. but I figure that with the new year and all, I should just erase the past, and try to move on towards the future. =) I had four resolutions last year, and 3 1/2 of them are on it this year. -_-' I tried to cut it down smaller so that I can achieve it this year.

1) Get my weight down to 120-130 pounds. I wanna look phantastic on my 21st birthday :)
2) Get rid of as MUCH of my debt as possible. :(
3) Save $20 a week. I think it's doable.
4) Read one book a month.
5) Get internship at aquarium and log in 250 volunteer hours there as well.
6) Get A's and B's in my classes.
7) Clean room & house more often.
8) Write in journal more often.

I feel like I've neglected my livejournal for quite some time. There was a time when I used to update this thing weekly, and now I've updated every couple of months. I used to give a play by play of my life. It might be due to having nothing to update about, but I'll try to come up with something. I like looking back at my old entries. Makes me realized how much I changed.

The only resolution I think I'll have trouble with is 2 and 3. =x I'm going to buy tickets to Wang Lee Hom's Music Man concert. Going to see him!! I'm so excited x) But it's $60 =x ... not including the gas it will cost to drive to Vegas just to see him. Oh wells.. it'll be worth the dent in my wallet. I'm hoping I can get a weekend job to help me survive during the spring semester, seeing that I won't be working at the Law Office once it starts :(. Disappointing really, this is one of the easiest jobs I've had.. since tutoring. But tutoring itself takes it toll. Oh wells. :(

I have a new photo journal :)

http://capturingthemist.tumblr.com

It ain't crazy or anything. Just some of my favorite pics that I've taken. =)

This year, I took the daunting task of cooking a Thanksgiving Dinner. It wasn't much, just turkey, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, and gravy. I wanted to do more, but due to budget restraints, I cooked whatever I could. Edamame was part of the menu too, cuz Lam's mom didn't want to do nothing. Next year, if I get the opportunity again, I want to make green bean casserole, and perhaps stuffing. I'm not a huge fan of it, but others are. My turkey was a little dry =( which made me sad, but its ok, next year I'll do better. Below is the dinner spread. Oh yea, there was corn bread, not from scratch =(, so that wasn't great. I like making things from scratch, wanted to make a pumpkin pie too, but hte others argued and said it would be easier just to buy it, so I gave in. Anywho, the dinner was pretty decent. Afterwards we played mahjong.. cuz what's thanksgiving with asians without mahjong? :p




Turkey, Corn Bread, Mashed Potatoes, 4 Cheese Macaroni, Edamame, (not included was the gravy), Sparkling Apple Cider

Meet Chandler :D After three months of internal turmoil, I FINALLY decided to get the UPGRADED Chandler since my old one was discontinued and my money was refunded back to me since there was nothing left to exchange back to me. After checking the status of my camera, it is now sitting at home WAITING to be opened by me. (Oddly enough, today is the ONLY day of the week I got out of the house EXTREMELY early for the sake of being a healthy and active person). Now I'm at work .. 24 minutes left and I'm WONDERING if I should screw with my gym schedule and just go home to my BEAUTIFUL camera. =/ However, the downside is the ridiculous traffic I have to endure before getting home to my camera. Second problem is also where would I go to test out the beauty of it. I was thinking The Grove, due to Chandelier's ease of use, her purpose is more of a social use as opposed to a professional use. Not to say that Chandler's is, but his features are a lot better than Chandelier's. Beside Chandelier really didnt do justice on how pretty The Grove really was when I took pics on Harriet's Bday.

I suppose I should just goto the gym.. despite going for the past four days. Gah.



.... Now that I'm rereading this entry, I'm a little ashamed that the big dilemna of the moment is whether or not I should go home to my camera. Man. how lonely am i? -_-' .. then again, i really shouldn't go down that road.


Good update? I'm going to the gym daily now. @ LEAST 4 days a week. I want to go everyday, but I get so lazy on the weekends x) and Tuesdays and Thursdays are EXTREMELY tight for me because I have class an hour before work ends. =/ I actually skipped class on tuesday but that was because I didnt do any of the assignments. No worries, will get caught up this weekend.

Hopefully my sleep schedule will be alright and I'll wake up early enough to go volunteer tomorrow morning. =x *crosses fingers* annd i might be able to test out my new camera while i'm at the aquarium =) yay!

Just watched some previews online and I wanted to make a note for myself so that I'll watch these movies when it comes out.

The Soloist November 21, 2008
Quantum of Solace November 14, 2008
Fast & Furious June 5, 2009
Changeling October 24, 2008
Four Christmases November 26th, 2008

Alright, so I'm watching the women's synchrnoized diving, and these girls are crazyyyy... practiced in this... cuz i seriously can never do what they're doing. I think it was Canada who was in their last round, and it was a pretty difficult dive I suppose, and when the girls hit the water, the commentator goes, "WHOA TIDAL WAVE, that's not going to score well" ... well the tidal wave was verbatim, the rest I'm not too sure, nonetheless, it was absolutely brutal. If I was that girl who hit the water, I'd hang up my swimsuit and call an early retirement. I mean seriously, TIDAL WAVE? .. not to mention "disaster hit water" or something along those lines. I mean, hearing those words would make me jump off the high-dive into an empty pool. -_-' Crazy commentating bitch..

I had a pretty lame dream last night, but when I woke up, I was extremely devastated that it wasn't true. Basically, I was out at my job on a field trip with the students, and I saw a gas station that was only 70 cents a gallon. Seeing this made me ESTATIC! I was waiting for the other counselors to help me get the students to calm down and I told myself in my head, that after we got everyone settled, I would quickly fill up my tank. I was about to fill it up too, when I woke up.

*sighs* man... the amount i would save if gas was the amount my head imagined it to be. :( As glad as I am that gas has gone down to $4.27/gallon, it's still a burn in my bank account.

I've attempted to watch Casino Royale three times. After those three times, I gave up on the idea that I would ever finish the movie, but I bought the DVD, cuz it was a hella good deal, so I figured might as well just try to sit through it. Oh man.. do I love Daniel Craig. Now HE is a MANLY-MAN! I'm getting disoriented just thinking about him. :D This movie was pretty kickass though, which makes me look forward to watching the new Bond movie coming out. :)

I was never a Bond fan, even though I thought Pierce Brosnan looked absolutely yummy, but I've become a fan of the franchise, at least I am now with Daniel Craig as James Bond.


Posting at 3:18 A.M. because if I fall asleep, I won't wake up on time for volunteer at the aquarium, which I don't want to miss. BUT my volunteering will make me miss the UPS man, who will, according to their site, be delivering my new camera (which I have decided to dub Chandler in honor of my love for Friends). =) So I have to leave a note and make sure my father somehow gets the package for me. I hope I get it tomorrow. Or at least Saturday. =x

in an effort to make myself feel better about life and myself, i splurged and got myself a camera :D whooooo!! :D I haven't quite decided what to name it yet... but its a beauty :) In the mail and will hopefully be in my hands by tuesday next week? maybe sooner?! As soon as I get it, I will be SNAPPING away!! :D so if i havent seen u in a long time please call so i can take prettiful pictures of you :D



ignore the sandisk 4GB SDHC card, and the case. I do get them but a different brand. NewEgg had some kickass deal where if I bought the camera they'd throw in a 2 GB SD card and a case for my camera. *swoons* its just lovely.



as superficial as it is, my pain and anger towards myself have subsided. :) i probably would feel a LOT better if i got the Nikon D40 like I was originally going to, but being financially challenged, I decided that it would be smarter if I settled for something just as good and a little bit cheaper. :) No words can describe my satisfaction and happiness.

I'm going through some awfully weird emotions tonight... =/

1) my pit of doom in my stomach..
2) the anxiety over the pit of doom in my stomach
3) estatic cuz lam, my best friend, FINALLY came back from china
4) missing my family over in the east coast.. especially two little girls <33 and my favorite homecuz, jessie. =(
5) missing a friend, cuz one of her homegirls is still MIA in china. damn china for taking my friends this summer!


with all these emotions bottled up, i'm starting to gag. its a weird reflex of mine that I recently picked about two years ago... maybe three. so i'm having a really difficult time trying to sleep with this new reflex of mine going off every other minute or so. bah. i really want to goto sleep too. :(

going through some weird.. internal pain. unsettling pit of doom in my stomach... and it aint hunger or my need to visit the restroom. i had this pain before, and let's just say i went through a rough couple of months trying to recover from it. i hope im not falling into some kind of psychological subconscious trap.. eh..

been watching chinese dramas: Legend of the Condor Heroes... not the one with Andy Lau, the mainland china one. and The Handsome Siblings. Legend of the Condor Heroes was so so.. i was irritated with the cantonese voice dubs and i'm not as comfortable when i listen to movies in mandarin. weird i know. my dad has been rewatching the show since i got it two weeks ago.. he's like in love with it. I heard the andy lau version was better and I did try to order Legend of the Condor Heroes on yesasia.com. I managed to get an order in when it was like 50% off. UNFORTUNATELY, there was some kind of delay with my payment through paypal, and by the time the payment was received they ran out of the Andy Lau version which upset me because I was looking forward to watching the goshdarn show. handsome sibling has brought me a new love, Nicholas Tse. Dicky Cheung is really funny too.. did not know that he was the monkey king in journey to the west. **which i was also unable to find online.. which is stupid because thats one of the best shows ever** i really liked handsome sibling.. it was depressing because i hated that everyone died in the end.. especially dicky cheung's love interests. i mean seriously.. ALL of them had to die? wth.. but i also felt extremely cheated with the ending. when the credits rolled, i was like.. no fucking way. thats it? -_-' but whatever, it entertained me all 30 hours.

work has been so-so. im more irritated with my students this year, and im trying to get rid of my job at the restaurant. i currently have one saturday opening shift which I am completely satsified with. but once school starts, i'm going to need to get more shifts cuz no more summer job that will give me a nice paycheck every two weeks :(.. ive been applying to jobs but havent gotten any responses.. which does not help my self esteem or self worth.


my sense and need to escape has been... growing.. i feel anxious and .. unsettled at least once a day now. i keep thinking i should goto philly... or d.c. i have family there and i can just goto school there, but i dont want to cuz i dont want to leave my dad. ugh. i hope this feeling goes away soon. half of me just wants to pack up my clothes and head over to europe. just fuck it all. but im too chicken shit to do that. bwah!

I think a couple of entries ago I saw someone in the picturing_foods make some ladybug cupcakes and it inspired me to try it! :)( More pics :) )

To repair my financial problems, I picked up a couple of extra shifts at the restaurant. I'm already dreading this decision. I'm glad that I'll be leaving in a couple of weeks (not permanently, but since I have a summer job I'm leaving the restaurant temporarily). I'm just a little reluctant because I really don't want this job forever. Right now, I think that's my main motivation for school, to not be a waitress for the rest of my life. I do think that it's easy money, but it gets extremely stressful, and the fact that the restaurant lacks organization and teamwork, does not make the job easier. Ugh.. I'm wondering if I should look for a waitress position at some other restaurant.. maybe some corporate one. We'll see. =/ I'm a little reluctant but ugh.

:( Due to my financial problems, I can't use any of the money I'm saving up. :( Boo. I really want to go shopping too... I'm tempted to just use my money, but apparently my sense of responsibility somehow found me recently. Well.. we'll see how long that lasts..


Btw. I need a book to read. Suggestions anyone? Preferrably fiction. I'm probably going to finish Chronicles of Narnia by the end of the week. (Yes, I know, I'm 19 years old and reading Chronicles of Narnia, but seeing that it never sparked my interest as a child, I figure I'd give it another try, and so far I'm liking it.) I was thinking of finishing Dracula.. which I started junior year and liked a lot, but got distracted and never got around to finishing it, but I can finish that in one sitting. But yea... I'll probably hit borders again on tuesday.. before work.

Very rarely do I have an "Awesome Friday", mainly because I'm always sleep deprived and I remain so for the rest of the weekend. On Fridays, I volunteer at the Aquarium of the Pacific (which is pretty kick@ss) from 9 a.m. - 2 p.m. The hours really aren't that bad, but for fear of being stuck in traffic, I try to leave the house by 7:30 or before. Meaning.. I have to wake up early. Waking up early is... as of today, my worst enemy. Something I have never been able to conquer. I am a night person. I enjoy the day, I do, I love the whole first dew on grass in the morning, and how the cold wind hits ur face and freshens you up. Whoop-ee. I just don't like to do it on a daily basis. No, no, no. But seeing that I love my volunteering position at the aquarium, and fear of not making a good impression, I, on all the times I've volunteered there so far, have been pulling all-nighters to make it on time. Yes, I am very aware of how dangerous this is trust me, the second time I pulled this little plan, I fell asleep at the wheel... three times... LUCKILY it was locally.. but still, dangerous nonetheless. I should've pulled over, but I was so close to home, literally so close, I made it through the whole freeway without falling asleep, i figure, might as well make it all the way home. But, yea.. three times. Fell asleep at the wheel. Hella dangerous. Unfortnuately, due to my financial funds, or moreso, lack of, I have also picked up a Friday shift at my workplace. =/ It's a 6-CL shift... and I stay till around 11:30 maybe midnight. THEN the next morning, I have work at 7:30 a.m. Do u see my predicament? Anxious that I won't make my 7:30 a.m. shift on time, I get restless and have a lot of trouble sleeping the night before. And normally on saturdays, it's girls' night out. We try to do something, go to each other's houses, etc., and I havent seen my girls so I suck it up and go. But I get tired... because the next morning I also have work at 7:30 a.m. WHY, WHY OH WHY u ask do I take such early shifts if I absolutely despise waking up early? Money. That's all. I'm willing to put my health, my mental stability, on the line for MONEY. -_-' BUt no worries, those days will be gone soon =), days where I finally have my weekend free!! x) how excited am i.

But, back to the main point. VERY RARELY do I have an Awesome Friday and man.. was it fr-indicking-tastic! Now a couple of months ago, I was wavering between whether I wanted to be an Oceanographer or a Communications major. The easy way, or the significant way where I felt useful? I decided to stick to Oceanography, btu the only problem for me was that I had very little experience in teh field, and small as it is, I had to crawl my way into it. Hence, my volunteer position at the AoP. But man, did I come at the right time. This week happens to be Volunteer Appreciation Week x), although I missed the festival last sunday (due to work urgh), I was.. appreciated =). The Aquarium offered us volunteers Free 15 minute massages, which completey made me feel great. I have been tense my entire life lol. I love massages and man did that one feel great x). After volunteer shift, we were able to go feed some of the animals behind the scene. Lucky for me, I got the last Sea Otter feeding spot! :D WhoOo! So on my cell phone is the feeding of Summer, one of our female otters, and man she was awesome x). I mean, it was no biggie u know, feeding it, but damn it felt AWESOME to finally like.. do something with the animals. x) It validated my choice of wanting to go into this field and just made me feel just a little bit closer to going in the right direction with my choice as a volunteer there. x) Thenn.. on my way home, I see this AWESOME Yellow LAKERS sports car. I mean awesome, I was so tempted to honk at them and whoop, but I was unable to drive up to them and do it cuz of a stupid truck but whatever. Seeing that car made my day xD. So far I've had a pretty good day... and right now I"m just trying to resist the very luring lull of sleep because I have work in 2 hours =x. I'm hoping what little is left of it will not ruin my oh so happy morning/afternoon. :) *knock on wood* x)

Not to toot my own horn, but I think my strongest asset.. and my weakest is my ability to empathize... Albeit, I may not do it all the time, but when I do, I can get extremely emotional. I mean extremely, friends who have seen me cry in a movie will verify that I definitely get way too emotional during a mushy scene (i.e. the ending of The Notebook, Titanic, Moulin Rouge). For me, that's when I know an actor/actress/movie (mostly its 1/3, sometimes 2/3, rarely 3/3) is exceptional, when I can feel what they're feeling. The joy, the anger, the sad, you name it, I will feel it with them. I get a very odd attachment to the characters that I see in the screen or pages, and I can... experience almost everything that they're experiencing. One of the many reasons why I love watching movies and reading books. I expect that's the reason why many people enjoy reading and watching movies. So when I come to an end of something, I get really disappointed and sad because my connection with these characters are gone. Very few instances do I feel satisfied with the end of a movie or book. As I'm typing this, I'm thinking I should probably get committed because of my strange attachment to somethign that doesn't exist. But when I get to an end of a book/movie, I feel abandoned. I went through the whole journey with my characters, aware of every minor detail that goes on, and when they leave me hanging, I feel cheated and no longer clued in on their world. When I read a book or watch a movie, I get completely immersed in it.. it's my escape from my universe. My oh-so-very dull and disappointing existence. To enter a place where I forget about everything that's currently going on with my own, makes me estatic to join in an adventure of someone else's. But in the end, the hero/heroine's story ends, and I'm stuck with having to find another story/movie to be entertained with.

I worry about my mental state sometimes, because I'm pretty aware of how unhealthy I am in the sense that my pessimism is extremely depressing sometimes, and my very odd attachments to things that should be of little importance. *Panda Bear, characters in a book, I mean seriously? even i know it's not healthy* So I mean... at least it's good that I acknowledge it, but like the many things that I acknowledge is wrong with my life, I have no idea how to change it.. or .. maybe i'm unwilling to change it. I dunno.

What caused me to write this entry? The past two days, I've been driving to Borders and indulging myself in the Twilight Series Saga. A pretty dumb indulgence of mine, that I haven't shaken off since I bought the first book three days ago. lol. So I've been going to borders to read Book 2 and Book 3 (I feel kinda bad, but I've been financially broke, but as soon as I recover, I definitely plan on getting the books) but I've grown attached to the characters in the book. It's an easy read, and I really shouldn't be reading it, since it's not very mentally stimulating, but I got hooked. So now I'm just waiting for Book 4.. which is the LAST book coming out on August 2, 2008. This reminds me of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I was so desperate for that book to come out so I can finally finish what happened. I practically inhaled the book when I got it, that I never really got to savior it. Anywho, this year I think... I made the resolution of reading a book a month.. and seeing that I haven't really kept up with it the past ... 4 months, I almost caught up with my quota in the past three days. -_-' Again, when I got Book 7 of Harry Potter last year, I inhaled it. Right now, I'm tackling Chronicles of Narnia. I adored the movie, so I'm pretty sure I'll love the book twice as much. But yea... just another notch in the bedpost of how stupid and dumb I can get. =/ Oh wells... maybe one day some person will find these insane qualities of mine a little endearing?